| If I were a maiden in distress in the days of old you
would come running to rescue me. Over mighty mountains and rivers flowing in torrents, on foot or on your trusty charger. Into battle you would go with your sword and shield to protect me. Dragons would roar and tear at your flesh but this would not deter you from saving me. No element would stop you as you fought your way to reach my side. Today I am a maiden in distress and where are you? Your answering machine is on and you are not responding to your pager. What is this that you are not home when I call! You know I don't even have a learner's permit for this computer!!!! A: Drive or CD is that like standard and automatic? CRASH!!! Do I have insurance for this? Bytes do I need a rabies or a tetanus shot or will it heal itself? I know you will yell at me... No I didn't do anything to it... I just turned it on.. and it doesn't work!!!! Read the manual sure, might as well take a course in Greek! Who writes these things anyway!!! Even the Dummy versions had to be written by a nerd. Opps sorry if I offended you ... you are my knight in shinning armor... nerd stands for Need Electronic Rescuer Dial............ What is this password business... you guys and your secret handshakes... won't a hello do? It is a bloody machine you know! It is flashing this threatening message... will you stand for this!!! I'm a maiden in distress!!!! Can't you hear my SCREAMS!!!! The neighbors think it is an air-raid warning! Ok going to fix this myself... teach you how independent I am! Ok the cover is off the hard drive and think I know where the problem is here... think this do-hickey thing should go some place... at least everything else seems to plug into something. Boy what a sexual experience... all these male and female ends... no wonder you guys get such a charge from this stuff... mechanical sex therapists. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr that did not do anything but it has this really weird sound now... wonder if I should unplug it first.... never know I could light up like a lamp here! Shoot don't think all this dust is good for these parts.....my 4 horsepower blower will dust it out and you thought I only use this to dry the dogs and inflate the air mattress... LOL! What's that smoke??? Just a burned down cigarette or is something getting really hot inside there? Hitting redial for the umpteenth time.... where are you??? Ok it seems the connections are all right... How do they get unconnected all by themselves?? If a woman had made this they would be sewed in there so good it would take a jack hammer to get them apart. Well might as well get that loose piece of metal out of the A: drive while I am in here. There is no back up plan for these things for emergency repairs. If they can make the CD open up think they would do the same for this drive!!! Boy you are going to hear about this when you call!!!! If you ever do call! Ok got it back together and am I proud of myself got all those screws and wires back in place. Testing... testing... testing... ok everything is humming and lights flashing! Yep! there it is my wonderful Windows picture just like it used to be :))))) Brrring! Brrring! Hello.... about time did you know I was a damsel in distress??? Stop laughing... IT IS NOT FUNNY!!! There was a thing-a-ma-jig loose in the back and the little metal tabby thing on the disk was stuck in the A:drive. Of course not!... You stop that! I did not do any such thing... it just got stuck inside of it. Well it is working now .... so there :P!!!! Oh by the way when you are by next time you want to get rid of this file the computer is still searching for??? Hello? Hello? You still there? Yea one of those pickle ones.. DLL something or other. Ahhhhh what would I do without you... you are my hero!! Think you can retrieve that data too?? That would be wonderful! What would you do without this maiden in distress to rescue? Talk to you later... what do you mean you are changing your number!!!! Wait what is it! Hello? Hello? Darn!!! Wore out another knight in shinning armor.
Cheryl C. Helynck 1998
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